


Sinful or Not, I Feel Something

by Aeos



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Compliant, First Kiss, First Time, M/M, Non-Graphic Smut, canonverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-09 08:29:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11100798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aeos/pseuds/Aeos
Summary: They had similar goals, ideals, and values. Some things were left up to their differing personalities; some weren't. They were almost akin to two halves of a whole. They both were fierce and tenacious. Eren; innocent but not pure. Levi; pure but not innocent. Their lives were a tango of support and care from one another. Sometimes spoken and sometimes not.Levi had always imagined it to be platonic, Eren had not.





	Sinful or Not, I Feel Something

They had similar goals, ideals, and values. Some things were left up to their differing personalities; some weren't. They were almost akin to two halves of a whole. They both were fierce and tenacious. Eren; innocent but not pure. Levi; pure but not innocent. Their lives were a tango of support and care from one another. Sometimes spoken and sometimes not. 

Levi had always imagined it to be platonic, Eren had not. 

\---

The low din of the party was at the back of Levi's mind as he nursed his drink. A young lady, brunette and fair was eyeing him from the bar; all smiles and quirks of the lips. Levi considered himself an attractive man, yes, but his rank of Captain and Humanity's Strongest certainly helped. The woman whispered something to a coworker and they both laughed while Levi felt all the bit more drunk. 

The Survey Corps had hosted a party to celebrate the defeat of the Titans and the taking of Wall Maria. And drunk cadets and cheerful seniors were merry and elated to have time off. Explorations into the outside world were occurring, and the ocean had been found. Levi hadn't believed Eren when he'd spoke of it privately to him, but he was proven wrong after all. 

The thought of the brunette soldier had Levi searching the room, where he almost immediately spotted a mop of shaggy hair and a lanky figure. Levi stood up, finishing his drink and setting it down for some maid to pick up. He shoved and squirmed his way through the crowd towards Eren and tapped on his shoulder soon after. The boy was clearly tipsy, judging from his dazed look and flushed cheeks.

"Want to get out of here?" Levi mused, glancing towards the woman at the bar. She was already flirting with another Captain. He turned his attention back to Eren, who hadn't broken his gaze from Levi's face.

"Shuure. I- I was gettin' tired anyway," Eren slurred, obviously drunker than expected. Levi wrinkled his nose in disgust at the smell of alcohol breath and motioned for the way out. He gained his footing and stumbled some, easily being caught by Levi's strong hands on his chest. As he did so, Levi could have sworn he felt Eren lean into the touch. That had him quickly moving away and walking outside, not bothering to see if Eren had followed. He could hear the shuffling of boots right behind him and eyes staring at the back of his neck.

Outside, a drunk was throwing up, and Levi scoffed in disgust.

It was cool outside; a strange occupancy for summer. Levi supposed that it was alright, however. Eren radiated heat like a fireplace.

"Captain...?" Eren spoke up, swaying some and meeting his superior's dark eyes. That earned a grunt in response, and he continued, "Shir, I wash wondering... h-how do you deal wish stress. I just-" Eren swallowed, looking away out into the night, "I'm scared."

That both did and didn't surprise Levi. He was a young man after all; not used to dealing with stress, "You're referring to the threat of the Titan's, yes? You know that-"

"No! I mean- thash not it. I'm talking... about a woman," Eren interjected, putting his hands up and flushing some at the ears, "It- It's a woman."

"You're stressed because of a woman?" Levi answered, raising a thin brow and crossing his arms, "You want my advice on this issue, then. Out of everyone."

"I wanted it to be you. I trusht you, Captain, sir.," Eren mumbled, scratching his ear and shrugging.

"Shoot then. What are you stressed about?" 

Eren swallowed, looking down a moment and then back up, "I'm worried that she won't want me. T-that I'm not her... her type."

Levi hummed in acknowledgment at that, scoffing some afterwards, "Ackerman, I'm guessing?"

That had Eren sputtering, shaking his head frantically, "No! No! She's - she's like a shister!"

Levi chuckled some in amusement, choosing to ignore the blush it earned from Eren.

\--- 

Levi stretched out his calves, watching the trainees practice advanced maneuvers amongst the branches of trees. They were making great progress; though Levi would never admit it. Beside him, he heard the click of maneuver gear and turned some, meeting Eren's eyes. 

"I remembered when I was like that. Bubbling around like a deer," Eren laughed, as if it were the funniest thing in the world. The sound had Levi looking away from his eyes hastily for an unknown reason.

"I don't recall ever having that "phase," He replied, "I was great from the start." 

Eren burst out laughing even harder, startling some recruits and even managing to make Levi chuckle in amusement.

"See- hah! That's what I don't understand, sir! You're not just shit jokes and bad attitude you're - you're..." Eren trailed off, not sure where to go with his sentence obviously. It had Levi raising a brow. He was about to ask, when Erwin walked up to them, smiling pleasantly at both of them. 

"I see that training is going well, Levi. If I didn't know better, I'd say you're actually invested in these cadets," The blonde stated, face smug. 

That earned a scoff from Levi, though he poorly hid the smile that formed. 

Beside him, he noticed Eren staring at him and looked towards him. The man's mood has changed, and he had a crease in his forehead. 

Levi couldn't place why Eren's demeanor had changed so suddenly. 

Later that day, he returned to his quarters, quickly taking a shower to rinse the sweat and grim from his body. It both calmed and improved his mood to rid himself of the accumulated filth. As he applied soap to his skin, his thoughts wandered as they usually did.

When Eren's smile and laugh came to mind, he immediately dropped the soap, eyes wide and brows furrowing. 

Gingerly, he reached down to pick his soap up, his head reeling from the strangeness of what had happened. Why had he thought of Eren? 

Why didn't it leave a feeling of pleasant uncomfortableness in his chest?

\---

The sharp whirs and snaps of maneuver gear sounded around him, his heart racing as he felt the flesh under his blades part. Blood splattered onto him, warming his skin and evaporating soon after. Levi hooked a line into the Titan's nape, landing there and carving out the flesh until he could see his subordinate. Levi summoned up his strength and ripped the boy free, feeling blisters form on his hands as he did so.

Eren was chanting something beneath his breath, eyes wide and glazed over. His teeth were snapping at Levi's fingers and he kept growling out I'll kill them all, I'll kill them all, I'll kill them all.

Levi managed to get Eren and him down to the ground, where the bulkier cadets subdued him. The brunette eventually wore himself out, steam rising from his body in waves. The both of them were taken to the sick bay, where Eren was given time to rest, and Levi was treated for his blisters. 

Hours passed, and he opted to stay in the medical bay to stand guard over Eren. He'd told the nurses he needed to make sure that he could subdue Eren; but in all honestly, he'd wanted to insure that Eren was alright. Levi told himself that this was the amount of care acceptable for superiors and subordinates, but something bothered him greatly about it.

He wondered briefly, how he could feel so shameful for caring about another.

\---

It was hot; unbearably so. 

The sun shone high above, rays coating the training field in a suffocating blanket. Trainees were running on fumes, panting and stumbling with exhaustion through the grueling training. Still, Erwin was steadfast in his decision to continue training. 

Levi was overseeing training grudgingly; his sleeves rolled up and sweat running down his forehead. He was uncomfortable, to say the least, and it reflected on his mood severely. 

He'd snapped out orders to many of the cadets, but something about Eren caught his attention. He'd collapsed on the ground, his chest heaving and cheeks flushed red with exertion. Levi felt something in him snap and he growled out, storming over to his subordinate and snarling, "What in Sina's name do you think you're doing. Is it suddenly time for a break, Eren? Last time I checked, cadets didn't decide when it was time to rest."

The brunette in question had been staring up at him since he had spoken. He looked betrayed; hurt. It made something in Levi's chest twinge uncomfortably and that only served to fuel Levi's rage even further, "Since you've decided to slack off now, you'll be staying after an hour to train extra. Consider that your punishment, Jaeger."

Eren continued to stare at him, and simply mumbled out a soft 'sorry'. He averted his gaze and Levi resisted the urge to lash out again. It bothered him greatly; like a painful itch under his skin. He left immediately after, returning to his post to oversee the rest of training.

Only when the rest of the cadets leave, did he approach a stoic-looking Eren, informing him that he was free to leave.

"S-Sir? Are you sure?" Eren asked, his eyes wide and questioning.

Levi simply nodded, brows furrowing as he met his gaze, "Go. Before I change my mind." 

Levi didn't miss the way Eren's eyes trailed down his sweat-soaked skin; leaving him feeling exposed.

"Of course... Captain," Eren trailed off, walking towards the barracks.

Levi couldn't stop himself from trailing his gaze down Eren's thin, lanky figure.

\---

Levi didn't fail to notice the way Eren's eyes lingered on him. How he'd brighten up some when Levi entered the room. How he'd fumble with his words when he talked to him. Even if the matters were trivial. Especially if they were trivial.

He began recalling times when Eren had done these things before it had come to his attention that Eren harbored feelings for him.

Simply acknowledging this did something funny to Levi's heart. 

From a young age, he had been told that homosexuality was morally wrong, against the will of the walls. Each conceived child was another human to keep the race alive. To indulge in thoughts or actions was...

What was it?

Was it wrong to care for a comrade?

Levi was disturbed from his thoughts by a firm hand on his shoulder. Erwin. 

"Levi, you alright. You seemed to be dozing off there. Do you need to take time off?"

Levi shook his head, clearing his throat and replying, "I'm fine. Just thinking. Say, that reminds me. Would you rather I take over training today or would you prefer doing it yourself?"

Erwin gave him a wary look, then chuckled lowly, "That's funny, Levi. That's the first joke you've told all week."

Levi explained after, to a surprised Erwin, that he didn't mind and was in fact, offering. 

Erwin certainly didn't have a problem with it.

Thankfully, it was a reasonable temperature that day, and the cadets were having fun. Levi had no qualms with that, as long as their performance didn't falter. 

Someone cleared their throat beside him and he turned to face Eren. The man looked somewhat perturbed, and he grinned a smile.

"Hello, sir. I've finished training, by the way! So... you know... I'm not slacking," Eren rambled rather awkwardly, not sure where to start. 

"Get to the point," Levi reminded him, arms now crossed.

"Yes uhm... I've just been noticing that you and Erwin seem close," He scratched his ear, mumbling.

"And?"

"I just think that it's a good thing! For you... to-to look happy," The brunette seemed to be realizing how strange a conversation he had started.

"So you're saying you've been watching me then?" Levi's eyes were on Eren completely now, never leaving.

"I watch you quite a bit sir."

Levi felt his chest constrict in a painful way, and he stepped somewhat closer to Eren, earning a blush from him. Aha.

"And what do you intend to do with this Eren? Do you think it's encouraged? Have you even thought it through?" 

The brunette swallowed, his stubborn native rearing it's head, "Sir, I know how I feel. I've... I've thought about it a lot."

Levi raised his brows, "Hoh? So you've been thinking about me."

Eren's blush spread to his neck and he blubbered, "Not- Not- in such ways, Captain! How- that's - "

Levi huffed, interrupting him and placing the back of his hand on Eren's cheek, "I'm only teasing."

Eren stared at him, his body frozen and lips parted. He seemed surprised. Hell, Levi was surprised. He was flirting with his subordinate. And not just any. Eren Jaeger. 

\---

Levi thought about him quite a bit as well.

During lunch, whilst training was occurring, and most shamefully; in his private quarters. 

At first, he'd quelled such ideas as disgusting, pushed thoughts aside. It was only his body talking. However, when he'd stumbled upon Eren late one night in his cell, touching himself from under his sheets and calling out Levi's name faintly, he'd lost the battle.

That one moment of voyeurism had tipped him over the edge.

He'd wake up from lust-filled dreams, panting and painfully hard beneath his bed sheets. Quickly, Levi would make his way to the shower, where he'd grown out his subordinate's name lowly until he was coming with shuddering knees.

The tension could be felt between them; just beneath the surface. They would send one another meaningful glances during training or breakfast. Whilst passing through the halls. It never went anywhere, however.

It seemed that they were in a state of limbo.

\---

It was inevitable that one of them would push the scale. Naturally, it was Eren. 

It had been late, and Levi had been working on signing documents for approving new Scouts. He'd heard a knock on his door and called for whomever it was to come in.

Eren had stepped in, his eyes smoldering and knowing. Levi had set his paperwork down, standing up and sitting on the edge of the desk, "Why are you here?"

Eren remained by the door, his voice low, "I'm done dancing around this. I know you want me, and I want you." He moved towards Levi, his movement calculated and precise. Before Levi knew it, he could feel the warm air of Eren's breath against his lips; just an inch away. His voice was a whisper, and it made Levi's knees weak in the best ways, "You want me."

Eren leaned in, melding his lips against Levi's and tilting his head to the side. He reached his hand up, groping at Levi's chest, feeling his muscles there. Levi was a puddle beneath him, his eyes already closed and his hands unmoving. 

He was limp as Eren took him to his bed and touched him so intimately. Gave him pleasure unable to describe. The way Eren breathed out his name against his lovebite-marked skin as he thrusted his hips into his tight heat was blissful. When they both climaxed, their skin smelling of sweat and sex, did Levi feel complete. 

 

It didn't feel so sinful anymore to feel this way. Not with how Eren held him and kissed him so tenderly.

\---

It had never been platonic. Not between the two of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Send comments my way on what you think.
> 
> Sorry if there are errors, this work is unbetaed!


End file.
